When I was young adult and even going into my thirties, I found myself hanging out with the “in” crowd. They were “in” because I didn’t really know myself, so I hung out with people by default. Don’t get me wrong, everyone I hung out I connected with on some level. What I started to realise though, was I didn’t like who I was becoming and it drained my energy.

I would:

  • Complain about my children more
  • Bag out my husband and be overly critical of his actions
  • Talk myself down and make fun of myself

All were mostly subtle behaviours. I found there was always something to complain about. Until I realised, time and energy spent complaining, is time and energy that can be spent celebrating. Celebrating what is working and focusing there instead.

Jim Rohn famously said: “You are the average of the five people you spend the most time with”

I had to make some conscious decisions that were very difficult to begin with and incredibly lonely at times. I even felt selfish to make decisions that really were best for me. Today those choices have created space to welcome in relationships that are more aligned with my values and ideals and I feel so much more energised as a result.

I want my children to be clear on their values and choose relationships that reflect their ideals and values and I know that starts with me.

Who do you choose to spend time with? Are your relationships in line with your values?

Understanding your values and living by them is level 4 on the Parent as Leader scale.

Choose who you spend time with wisely.

Parent as Leader Scale