Balancing your work with kids

One thing that is really important to me is being the mum I want to be while coaching other mums to be the mum they want to be. I have always been career orientated.  I see myself as a “make-it-happen-kinda-girl”.  I have an idea and if it’s realistic, I will put it into action. Being this “make-it-happen-kinda-girl” I meet with some challenges when I add two beautiful kids (one school age, one pre-school), an awesome marriage, running a successful business and running an efficient home into the mix; however, somehow I am making it work! So here’s what I am thinking and doing in order to make things work : 1)   “Challenge it is, impossible it is not!” – Thinking this way allows me to see any challenges for what they are and not give up at the first hurdle.  This particularly helped me when one of the kids was really sick on the day I had booked to see a client.  It also helped after I had booked myself onto a course for 10 days and then found out my childcare arrangements wouldn’t work.  What a week! Thinking this way allows me to accept what’s happened and encourages me to find solutions. 2)   “Slow and steady wins the race” – Let me tell you, for a “make-it-happen-kinda-girl” this is a tough one to get my head around! This one is really important to me because if I want to connect with my hubby, exercise, spend time with my kids or prepare home cooked healthy meals, I need to carve out time for that during my week. I would...

Pre-Schooler Playground Battles to Joys

Have you ever had a situation in a public playground where your child is trying to play on something and there’s not much sharing going on? Do you know how to handle it? I took my three year old to a nearby playground. He was so excited because he loves playing on the wooden pirate boat. As soon as I opened the gate he ran over to the boat and found two girls standing at the helm and their mums chatting at the entrance. I saw my little 95cm boy go up to the mums and he asked, “Can I have a turn next on the boat?” I saw the mums smile and nod their heads. He was smiling and walked off to play on other equipment. Ten minutes later he went back and asked a second time. This time the mums looked at him, looked at each other and then continued their conversation. I had been watching my brave little 95cm boy asking a question of two adult women twice his height, and feeling a sense of pride that he had plucked up the courage to do so. Now he came over to me in tears and said, “They won’t let me have a turn on the boat.” My instinct was to say “They will sweetheart.”  It was in this moment that I realised the message I was sending to him was that it was ok not to share and that, if faced with a challenge, you just sit and hope it will pass. The biggest realisation was that he was coming to me to ask for help...

How To Enjoy Flying with Kids

As I write this I am on a London – Sydney flight with a flight time of 22 hours. This is our family’s sixth long haul flight in five weeks. It has been busy! And fun! Whilst standing with my three year old, a fellow passenger remarked “It is a LONG flight…” Indeed he was right; however it occurred to me that I don’t actually say that to myself. Instead I say “It is what is.” I began thinking about what else I think, feel, say and do to allow me to enjoy these journeys and have fun in the sky… When I woke up in London in the morning I had slept very little, had a migraine and my period.  It was not an ideal start on the morning of a flight with two children, one preschooler and one school age.  Acceptance was the key here so I accepted that “it was what it was” and off we went. Preparation the day before: When preparing for a flight I remind myself that it is my choice to go, and that it always involves packing and organising. This allows me to accept that the preparation is not pushed onto me.  I know I made a choice and that makes me feel empowered and less resentful about everything we need to do. Organising hand luggage: For long haul flights we use three bags. My husband and I have back packs that we wear and place under the seat in front of us on the plane.  We have a wheelie bag for the kids to take turns with and which goes...

How do you handle it when your partner “sneaks” off….

Do you have times, perhaps on the weekends, where you are looking after the kids and your partner is nowhere to be found? Sunday morning this happened to me. I offered my husband a lie in on Sunday morning and I woke up with the kids. I made some pancakes and left plenty for hubby when he woke. He had a great sleep until one of the kids woke him up at around 10am. He had breakfast and I prepared a play activity for the kids outside. Then hubby was nowhere to be found (OK he was in a quiet corner with an iPad). He finally surfaced at midday ready to play with the kids. So what went through my mind? When the youngest came to me for the 5th time whilst I was trying to finish some work, I began to feel annoyed. I was thinking, hang on, hubby got a lie in, I made him breakfast, the least he could he could was entertain the kids for a bit! I don’t like feeling annoyed and I like to respond with choice rather than fly off the handle, so I can began to think from different perspectives. The first perspective was my perspective, described above, which left me feeling annoyed. The second perspective was Hubby’s perspective. Perhaps he needed some “him time.”  Perhaps he hadn’t even considered that I may like him to do something different than what he was. Perhaps, he got lost in time as he can do sometimes. This perspective left me feeling less annoyed and more understanding. The third perspective was a fly on the wall...

School holidays Thriving Guide for Parents

Have you read lots of messages, listened lots of radio talk shows and heard many parents saying, “THANK GOD the school holidays are over”?Have you noticed how much we hear this and how little we hear, ‘Holidays were GREAT – it was beautiful having time with my kids and doing stuff together”? I wonder what it would be like to be able to say this and mean it? Here’s a School Holidays ‘Thriving’ Guide (not just ‘Surviving’): 1) Acknowledge Yourself – How often do you acknowledge for yourself what you do as a parent? How often do you stop to think about what you enjoyed about the kids today? Keeping a focus on what you DO and enjoy, helps you to take away the focus from what you don’t do and what you don’t enjoy– it’s a quick route to internal happiness! What would you like to acknowledge about yourself?  Here are a few things you can do to acknowledge yourself and what you enjoyed with the kids during the school holidays: Share with your partner/friend each day, something you enjoyed about the kids today. Keep a daily acknowledgement journal. Get online weekly and share with Raising Happy Humans Facebook group your highlight for the week. THINK: “I ROCK..!” 2) Acceptance – Acceptance is: “I may not necessarily like it, I may not want it but it is what it is.” Acceptance is a key resource in allowing you to manage escalation of your emotions.  For example, if you feel frustration because the house is messier during the holidays, this frustration may turn into anger and you end up raising your voice at the kids, then you...
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